After the challenges families have faced over the past 18 months, kids finally get to be kids again – sort of… We’ve asked for some helpful back to school tips for all the parents out there.

A New School Year

This upcoming school year means having a more regular schedule, meeting up with friends again and getting to show up in new school clothes. Great for kids and parents, right?

Parents Get a Break

While there are still many COVID concerns with all the latest variants, parents will be relieved not having to help teach the kids between Zoom meetings as has certainly happened. Thank Heavens.

Unfortunately many children may be even more apprehensive about going back into the class room. Those same children may have found being at home a safe haven both mentally and physically. Now there will be strangers and new teachers to contend with – along with COVID protocols to learn.

Going back to school is another big change. A new setting, especially for those just beginning or heading into high school is difficult for many. All of a sudden kids are expected to know what they’re doing. What a huge change from being at home to now being back in school.

Samantha Barnes of Sweet Spot Family Counselling Services offers these helpful back to school tips.

Tip #1 – Change

Accept that change is difficult for everyone and that there will be an adjustment period that may last longer than you think.

If you’re not sure if your child is having a tough time with the back to school transition, think about how they normally act when they’re stressed and look for those behaviours. For instance, watch for stomach or headaches. This may be caused by anxieties they’re feeling if they become frequent. Once you recognize what they tend to do under stress, you’ll be better able to understand the changes they’re dealing with.

Tip #2 – Routines

It can help to keep routines at home as predictable as possible, use calendars and weekly family meetings to talk about the week ahead and any changes that may occur. Encourage your children, especially younger ones, to talk about their feelings. With older children, allow their thoughts and concerns with upcoming events.

Tip #3 – Downtime

Allow for quiet or down time after school and/or unstructured play to release pent up energy. Kids need time to decompress and reset after school. If you move them too fast into chores or homework, it may backfire. Kids need time to regulate their bodies and emotions. Just like we need to kick back a bit after work, our kids need space from the rigors of the day as well.

Tip #4 – Be a Safe Person

Be a safe person for your children to vent and talk out their frustrations. Try to listen without problem solving for them. Instead, focus on validating their feelings and reminding them that they’re doing a good job managing through difficult times.

Tip #5 – Talk to a Professional

If things seem to be getting worse instead of better over time or your child seems depressed or anxious it may be time to reach out to a mental health professional to get some extra support.

Raising kids during a pandemic hasn’t been easy on anyone. When parents try to push through the tough times or troubleshoot everything on their own – the situation can become very challenging – and draining.

Take care of yourself as a parent or you’ll not be any help to your kids. The best role model you can be is the person who takes care of themselves and then takes care of their kids.

If things are beyond your control, reach out for assistance. Recognizing the need for additional professional help is half the battle won.

As a parent, you want to do everything you can to protect your child from harm and make sure they grow up healthy and happy. You make sure they wear a bike helmet and knee pads, but if they do take a tumble and break an arm, you immediately seek medical attention.

Some “boo-boos” aren’t as noticeable as a broken bone, but these emotional wounds hurt just as bad. If left untreated, these emotional injuries can result in further problems as your child grows. This is where therapy comes in.

“But isn’t my child too young for therapy?” you might be wondering. In my practice, I have seen children as young as three years of age. Trauma and behavioral issues don’t have an age restriction, they can affect a child at any age.

Signs Your Child May Need Therapy

Instead of focusing on the age of the child, it’s better to address the particular problems he or she may be having. As the parent, you know your child best. While a friend or family doctor may tell you your child is just “going through a stage,” you may recognize that something seems… off or not-right. Trust your instincts.

With this in mind, here are some signs that may indicate a problem that may require specialized attention. Your child:

• Is having trouble at school (grades, bullying others, talking back to teachers…)
• Is attempting to injure themselves
• Avoids family functions and ignores friends
• Experiences frequent mood swings and/or extreme emotions (anxiety, angry outbursts)
• Has difficulty concentrating
• Had difficulty sleeping
• Is eating far more or far less than before

This is by no means an exhaustive list but gives an indication of the kinds of behavior that may need addressing.

It is also important to mention that other things can be ruled out before you decide to give therapy a try. For instance, has your child had a full medical work-up recently? Her difficulties at school could be caused by an emotional disturbance, OR they could be caused by poor eyesight. His insomnia could be caused by anxiety, OR it could be the result of a biological issue that is causing him pain. Are you and your partner arguing more? Is your child’s behavior a natural response to an emotional situation at home?

Talk to Your Child About Therapy

While you may be worried your child is too young for therapy, your child may quite like the idea of talking to ‘someone special’ about how they feel. And, at the end of the day, your child is taking cues from you on how to feel about things. If you feel therapy has a certain stigma, your child will feel shame and not want to explore this option. But if you see therapy as beneficial, chances are your child will as well and be open to trying it.

Once you decide to explore treatment options, look for a therapist who specializes in helping very young children. They will most likely put an emphasis on art and play therapy, allowing your child to express themselves in a way that is natural for them.

Be sure to ask as many questions as necessary to select a therapist you feel comfortable with, and speak openly with your child about treatment so they can know what to expect.

If you believe your child may benefit from therapy and would like to speak about treatment options, please get in touch. I would be more than happy to see how I may help.