Couples Counselling in Barrie On
Conflict in relationships is completely normal, and even healthy on some level. Unfortunately, sometimes conflict that is left unresolved for extended periods of time can lead to dissatisfaction in your relationship and ultimately even bring some couples to separate.
Couples argue about many different things, common themes include money, and family issues such as parenting differences and extended family roles another common issue can be unhappiness with intimacy and sex. Lack of effective communication and or connectedness in a relationship can be a major influence on whether or not a couple stays together long-term. Often couples wait far too long before reaching out for help, thinking that the issues will resolve themselves on their own. It’s common for couples to not fully understand the role of the therapist in couples counselling and worry that they might take sides and look for someone to blame.
A skilled therapist is not there to take sides. Instead, they are there to support and encourage. validate and help couples open up the lines of communication again so that they can either resolve the ongoing arguments or even find a way to let go and move forward even while still disagreeing. In couples counselling the relationship is the client so your therapist is there to help you find the best solution for the relationship, not to take sides or assign blame. Your therapist instead shifts the focus to acceptance and understanding in hopes to increase overall satisfaction on both sides.
We often get asked what a typical initial couples therapy session looks like. Of course, there is no perfect answer to this as each couple is unique in their challenges and the way in which they will resolve their issues however we do have some common threads such as establishing session rules and setting and exploring boundaries in session to ensure everyone feels safe to share their thoughts and feelings. Gathering background information so your therapist can better understand both yourself and your partner and your journey together. Setting both short and long-term goals to help guide the therapeutic process.
Sometimes during the course of therapy, the couple may decide that they’ve done all the work they want to do and choose to separate. In this case. Often times the couple actually chooses to stay in therapy in order to continue to work on effective communication to help them during this difficult time. A low conflict amicable separation has many benefits not only for the separating couple but for their children and family as well.
Some things to consider before starting couple work:
You don’t have to be 100% ready or convinced it’s going to work to get started. Making the call to interview a therapist and book an intake session to explore options is a step you take before you “feel ready”.
Your relationship with your therapist is a very important part of treatment. Make sure you feel comfortable with them their style and approach and even the way they talk to you. Your comfort level with them will likely determine your willingness to engage and stay committed through the process.
This isn’t an overnight fix. It will take time to change patterns and establish new ways of being. If you commit to showing up and doing the work though it can and will happen.
Ready to take that first step? Reach out to us today and let us get started. https://sweetspotcounselling.com/contact/